"What other option is there?" Well, you could always let them be. That doesn't have the visceral pleasure of getting them back, sharing the pain as it were, but... sharing pain doesn't mitigate its impact on you at all. It remains, like a stone.
I can't see the value in magnifying pain. I've been through it; all humans have. Would I wish it for myself? The answer is no, I'd love to have a life filled with rainbows and kittens. And I think the golden rule here applies very strongly, to do unto others as you would have done to you, and I think the urge to "traumatize them back," as expressed here, fails on every level.
So they're annoying, frustrating, even traumatizing? Well, fine: what would you like to have done to you if YOU were annoying, frustrating, traumatizing? Would it be worth it to magnify that? Would it make the world better to increase the amount of pain in the world?
I can't see it. I say, "no." Boundaries are fine; if someone's hurting you, *letting* them is self-abuse. Build walls. But to build cannons, instead? I find that incredibly sad.
Traumatize Them Back
"What other option is there?" Well, you could always let them be. That doesn't have the visceral pleasure of getting them back, sharing the pain as it were, but... sharing pain doesn't mitigate its impact on you at all. It remains, like a stone.
I can't see the value in magnifying pain. I've been through it; all humans have. Would I wish it for myself? The answer is no, I'd love to have a life filled with rainbows and kittens. And I think the golden rule here applies very strongly, to do unto others as you would have done to you, and I think the urge to "traumatize them back," as expressed here, fails on every level.
So they're annoying, frustrating, even traumatizing? Well, fine: what would you like to have done to you if YOU were annoying, frustrating, traumatizing? Would it be worth it to magnify that? Would it make the world better to increase the amount of pain in the world?
I can't see it. I say, "no." Boundaries are fine; if someone's hurting you, *letting* them is self-abuse. Build walls. But to build cannons, instead? I find that incredibly sad.